I was very impressed by this edit. The pacing was really good and it flowed very well. I enjoyed this far better than the theatrical cut. It felt more faithful to the source material than the original cut. The movie itself is gorgeous and I feel like less = more which was shown by your cut. The didn't hate the original cut, but I came away cold and it felt too dumbed down. I'm glad this was rectified with this cut.
As a big fan of the original anime movie, I was somewhat disappointed by the original live action Ghost in the Shell release, which I saw in theatres. The main criticisms I had were around the dumbing down of the material, significant changes to the overall visual style, lack of story coherence, and the score. Nerdwriter does a very insightful comparison of the visual elements here, which really resonated with me: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v2soHxEN79c&feature=youtu.be
This edit does a fantastic job at fixing these issues, as much as possible in a fanedit, while also improving the pacing. I think removing some of the 'on the nose' explanations helps the viewer focus on exploring core cyberpunk elements themselves. Trimming sub plots to focus on the main story arc works really well, and gives more relative time to the core Major experiences.
Thoroughly recommend over the main theatrical cut.
As much as I enjoy the unfairly maligned 2017 film adaptation of the Ghost in the Shell manga, this leaner and tighter fan-edit outdoes it in my opinion. Every change made is 100% smart and justified, it really improves the pacing -- which is kind of amazing since the original cut is an already well-paced film -- and somehow even manages to better capture the spirit of the original source material. Really great stuff.