Review Detail

9.0 2 10
rikersbrain_front
Shorts September 09, 2022 1521
(Updated: October 27, 2022)
Overall rating
 
9.0
Audio/Video Quality
 
9.0
Audio Editing
 
10.0
Visual Editing
 
10.0
Narrative
 
8.0
Enjoyment
 
8.0
First, this fanedit does exactly what it sets out to do... remove all the flashbacks from the episode.

As others have noted, this episode was a money-saver thrown together with flashbacks and it's pretty dire in its original form. By trimming all the flashbacks, you're left with the substandard original story. For viewers who want to watch every episode, this is by far the best way to watch this episode.

Now, on to the constructive criticism. Can anything be done to improve this fanedit? Quite simply, YES. A few more "Enterprise passing over the planet" shots to show time is passing would help. Basically, in the original narrative structure, a poisoned Riker is fighting for his life, reliving moments from previous episodes. We would go from Troi and the Doctor discussing treatment to the flashbacks, representing Riker's inner struggles. Now, without those inner struggles, we go from Troi and the Doctor discussing treatment to Troi emoting over Riker's deteriorating condition. Without breakaway shots, some of these seem abrupt. So, my ONLY suggestion on this fanedit is to throw a couple of breakaway shots to indicate the passing of time. Maybe even rearrange the narrative a bit to create breakaway shots from the existing bits.

Otherwise, this is a seamless edit and the best way to view this relative stinker of an episode.

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Comments

2 results - showing 1 - 2
Ordering
(Updated: October 27, 2022) October 27, 2022
Thank you for the notes. I did add one shot of the Enterprise orbiting the planet to cover a particularly rough cut, I'm not sure why I didn't think to do the same thing for more of the cut scenes. Unfortunately for reordering scenes, the only ones that can really move are Picard sending Data and LaForge down to the planet, and then their scene down there. They obviously have to remain in sequence with each other, and when I tried moving them later in the episode it seemed out-of-sync with the order of Pulaski's work in Sickbay. If I do a version 2 of this edit in the future, I'll try again and see if maybe re-ordering some of her dialogue can help make the change feel more natural.
A
asterixsmeagol
October 27, 2022
If the sequences cannot be re-arranged, just adding an establishment shot of the Enterprise in orbit to music would be sufficient.
K
keithbk
2 results - showing 1 - 2