January 10, 2013
I have been watching a lot of 007 fanedits lately because I consider myself a huge James Bond fan. Yet, every time I watch one, I find myself remembering how truly awful some of the movies in the franchise have been. It is hard to choose the very worst James Bond movie, but this (not your edit, but the original) has absolutely got to be very close to being the most absolutely terrible entry. A lot of the Roger Moore Bonds kinda blend together for me because he did so many. Sean Connery remains the ultimate James Bond. Timothy Dalton was very underrated and I think Living Daylights is one of the better Bond films. And then there is Pierce Brosnon. I loved Remington Steele and thought he would make a perfect James Bond. But the scripts or the directors or someone mishandled the movies, and none was worse than this. From the opening where James Bond is captured, held and tortured fro an indeterminate amount of time (could there be a WORSE way to start a Bond movie!?!). And does our brilliant hero secret agent finally escape? Nope. He gets exchanged for a guy walking around with diamonds in his face. And about that: what the hell? I get that maybe right after the explosion some diamonds got lodged in his face, but there is just no logical reason for them to remain there. I cannot think of any Bond movie with such a ridiculous cartoonish villain. Even Jaws was more plausible---at least those teeth could be used as kind of a weapon. And then, he checks into the Hong Kong Yacht Club where they send up a masseuse with a gun. Why? They're going to kill him? While filming it behind a 2-way mirror? What for? This movie is so screwed up. Okay, I have yet to talk about the edit, but I needed to vent about what a dreadful movie this was to begin with, and seeing this made me realize how fully I managed to block it from my mind entirely.
The editing, sound, picture...everything was done flawlessly. I can't point to a single thing, major or minor to complain about. But it is just such a terrible movie, I think no amount of editing can save it. Certainly this is a vast improvement over the original, but "vast" is not enough in this case. There isn't enough vastness in the universe that could make this movie any good. Such a shame! I'm sure the budget was huge; Halle Berry looks amazing (and is the best thing about the whole movie), cool cars--although the green jaguar that the enemy is driving on the ice is cooler that James Bond's car, but what a misguided movie. This one makes me appreciate the Daniel Craig era quite a lot more. It even makes me feel like I could write a better James Bond script. It's amazing how all the elements can be there--good actors, good locales, the cars, gadgets---everything that you would assume makes a great James Bond movie, and yet fail so spectacularly. It almost makes Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull seem like a good movie.
Well that sure is a lot of negative comments for a movie I am ultimately giving a good review of. The positive numbers and the recommendation are entirely for your edit, which, as I said, is flawless. But it's like getting a bunch of Dr Frankenstein's together to try to recreate the ideal re-animated Hitler; even the best most perfect one is still...you know---Hitler. So this is an excellent, excellent edit of an irredeemably bad movie. Anyone who saw the original should at least give this a watch. It is still, probably the very worst 007 movie, but this version makes it a somewhat better worst 007 movie.