Grown Ups 2 - The Grounded Cut
With that said I had a lot of expectations for Grown Ups 2. But it failed miserably. Not only did it have a disjointed story with unresolved subplots, it featured alot of painfully unfunny running gags and slapstick, not to mention horribly delivered dialogues and Nick Swardson.
What this edit aims to do is to reduce and remove all the bad elements from the movie, as much as I possible could, to keep the movie grounded and sanitized, free of fart jokes, burp snarts, 'whaaats', and other running gags. I also wanted to bring the feel of the movie closer to that of 2010's Grown Ups.
2. Columbia Pictures and Happy Madison Productions intro.
3. Van Halen's 'Summer Nights' added to intro shot of village and the Feder house.
4. 'The Grounded Cut' added to title card.
5. Deer sequence heavily trimmed. Shortened Deer pissing, no shower masturbating and Roxanne pointing at her son's genitals, no deer eating food, all of chubby postman's lines cut, no Salma Hayek bra jokes.
6. The Lamensoff household sequence untouched.
7. Chris Rock's unfunny 'Nicki Minaj implant' joke cut. Ronnie's butt shaking trimmed.
8. Minor trims - 'Later hiccups' and Sandler's deer reference during conversation about Greg asking his crush out, cut.
9. Nick Swardson's painfully unfunny intro trimmed because it could not be cut entirely.
10. Sandler's lame bus driver jokes cut.
11. Ronnie's second ass dance cut.
12. Swardson snoring and eating cheetos stuck up his nose all cut.
13. Swardon being played like a puppet in the bus driver's seat cut.
14. Minor cut - Adam Sandler accelerating the bus to have Swardson thrown head-first into the rear door of the bus.
15. Jon Lovitz's pervy yoga sequence entirely cut. Also cut is muscular lady's jock-strap joke.
16. All of Swardson's Kmart sequences cut.
17. Tim Meadows's 'whaaat's reduced to just one time, jokes re-arranged, Chris Rock strangling Tim Meadows is cut.
18. Bumpty asks out Rock's daughter. Ass-showing coach's rope climbing and Bumpty's idiotic retort cut.
19. Kmart parking lot trimmed. No Burp-snarts. No police escorts.
20. Ballet show scene slightly trimmed - Jon Lovitz completely cut. Swardson left in because he could not be cut without causing awkward jumps in ballet music track.
21. Ice-cream pooping trimmed.
22. Principle's belly button 'fruit loop?!' left in because it could not be cut.
23. Frat boy party sequence untouched.
24. Higgins and muscular lady argument in garage trimmed.
25. Higgins tire sequence slightly trimmed to completely cut Swardon's unfunny park scene.
26. Frat boys finding their HQ vandalised trimmed slightly.
27. Keithie rugby scene slightly trimmed to cut 'Don't tell your motherrrrr'.
28. Frat Boys interrogating Rock's son trimmed to cut 'drinking and driving' line by Steve Buscemi.
29. Bean's butter scene cut. Everyone trying to explain what a burp-snart is, completely cut
30. Bumpty's 'Whaaaaaat' after Rock throws coke in his face cut.
31. Super-market scene. Steve Buscemi's 'party 80s style' line cut - One second he's pissed, the other he's excited about the party, the next he's pissed again. (Whaaat?)
32. Bumpty free styling on his date completely cut.
33. Kevin James breaking a table while standing on it - cut.
34. Tim Meadows's wife's 'whaaaaaat' after Rock's black muppet line cut.
35. Spade licking muscular lady's biceps cut, just ends with him biting it. Bean and Eric watching it also trimmed. That whole scene in its entirety is just not right.
36. Swardson's Boy-George gay convo with 'Stud-muffin/fitness trainer' left it, but trimmed after 'GOD he's hot!'
37. Kevin James's burpsnart after Bean plays the keyboard like a maistro cut. Burpsnarts completely cut in this film.
38. The stupid parts of Lenny trying to force his daughter to go to sleep cut.
39. Cheri Orteri's 'I JUST WANT TO BE ALONE!' and Steve Buscemi's lame unfunny hip-hop slang lines are cut.
40. Swardson's pee stain scene cut out. Ends at Lenny's 'This is great'.
41. Bumpty and Tim Meadows's rap/beatboxing and their 'whaaaat's afterward completely cut.
42. Lenny's unfunny pretend-provocation largely cut down during Steve Austin's onnfrontation at the party.
43. Swardson's Fraternity line and Buscemi's 'I hate white people' lines cut.
44. Ronnie's biting gag cut down, except for once during the yoga scene earlier.
45. Swardson's and fitness trainer's fight scene completely cut. No more vomiting, no more Swardson making out with the dog.
46. Minor cut - Shaq's lame 'don't hit me!' line cut.
47. Steve Buscemi's laugh at the end of the fight cut.
48. The gang at Lamensoff's house. Lenny makes up with Roxanne afterwards,
49. Lenny's burpsnart cut out, replaced with Bob Welch's 'Sentimental Lady' playing as camera zooms out of house and fades to black.
50. Credits role, Jon Lovtiz credit removed. Rupert Holmes's 'Pina Colada' song plays after 'Sentimental Lady'.
First off, my low enjoyment factor has nothing to do with the edit itself, it's because even with all of the garbage edited out, it's still a boring and messy movie. The edit itself is fantastic because MWRK did a stellar job of taking a completely unwatchable mess and turned it into something I was able to at least sit through...
The theatrical version was so horrible, my wife and I agreed to just turn it off and return the disc to Redbox. It was really just horrible. So, it's a testament to the editor that I was able to sit through the whole thing. Sadly, I don't think any further cuts would even be possible because if you cut any more of the stupid crap, you'd be left with maybe 3-4 punchlines and the rest would just be filler, leaving 95% of the movie as pure filler.
I don't know what happened with Sandler here, but this movie just went full retard. I really liked the first one.
Anyways...Props to the editor for turning watery diarrhea into just a fart with no smell.
I consider myself an Adam Sandler apologist. The man has made a lot of really funny movies. Yes, he's made his share of bad films. But even the worst ones are still enjoyable. There's something about the man that I find funny. I mean damn, I did a full-length podcast style commentary with g1orkatsos examining his filmography. Basically what I'm trying to say is that I enjoy Adam Sandler movies and I don't give a damn if you don't like him.
That being said... Grown-Ups 2 is a terrible movie. So many dumb, tedious jokes. It wasn't pleasant to watch. Thankfully the MWRK Cut is miles above the theatrical. (Well maybe like one or two miles above. He doesn't turn it into Shakespeare or anything.)
Gone are many nauseating running jokes and crude humor that falls flat. The stupidest characters are left (mostly) on the cutting room floor. What's left is all the funny stuff (and still a good amount of lame stuff).
The editing is excellent. Except for maybe one spot, I doubt you'd be able to tell anything had been cut. In fact, I was amazed how many one-liners were cut when I finished watching the edit and read over the cutlist.
BUT. This edit is recommended only if you're a fan of Sandler movies. If you hate him with a passion, don't waste your time watching this garbage.
A/V Quality - 10
Editing - 10 visual, 9 audio
Narrative - 8
Enjoyment - 7 (original 4)
Recommended drink: Pain, Pain, Go Away