Love Actually: ADigitalMan’s Bloated and Flatulent Extended Edition

- Alternate opening that morphs from a famine relief poster in Harry’s office to the scene when that poster was photographed, featuring two African women talking jovially about their husbands and the merits (or lack thereof) of a prospective son-in-law
- Daniel looking up pictures of Claudia Schiffer online and getting lured into a barrage of pornographic pop-up ads just as his father-in-law arrives unexpectedly.
- Extended sequences of how this allows Daniel and Sam to bond unexpectedly, and a peek into Sam’s room, where he has built a shrine to romance films.
- “Bad Bernard,” Harry and Karen’s disgruntled son, laments being cast as an angel in the Nativity play.
- Mia visits Mark’s gallery as he unveils his new photographs... and finds them to be much more than he bargained for.
- John and Judy discuss Christmas presents for their family and feel the first arrows of love.
- Harry and Karen visit Mark’s gallery and select it as the venue for Harry’s office party.
- Karen is called to visit Bad Bernard’s Headmistress about his Christmas essay.
- The Headmistress returns home and tells her ailing lover about Bernard’s essay, bringing some humor to her day.
- Billy Mack and Joe visit the suits at the record label and to Joe’s chagrin, Billy Mack tells them what he really thinks.
- Daniel and Sam lip synch to Scott Walker’s “Joanna”
- John and Judy’s grossly out-of-place arrival at the play is removed.
- Karen opens the play with a special note to the Headmistress.
- Post-credits scene bookends the Africa subplot where the daughter and son-in-law referenced in the alternate opening express genuine love in spite of difficult times.